Nautical Hyperblast Tonight @ The Monster House

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In the Alive last Week, I wrote about Weed Steeler. Well, their 7 inch is a Split with Nautical Hyperblast , A Springfield,Ohio Grindcore band. So I felt like Nautical Hyperblast deserved some love. Keeping with the water theme, I discussed Pool etiqette with the NH’s front man, Bill Lamkin.

Wes Flexner:I understand your parents have a pool. What is your stance on peeing in the pool?

Bill Lamkin: As long as you don’t do it from the outside in, you’re fine.There are worse things that could happen.

WF :I think thats really gross. I don’t want to be in pee water. How do you justify it?

BL: Chlorine. Plus. Let’s be honest, Sometimes the pool is a bit cold and you want to warm part of yourself up. We have heaters, but they aren’t on high enough some of the time.

WF:Have you ever known people to have sex in a pool? Is chlorine an effective birthcontrol?

BL: I did once, but it was a really weird situation in high school. My parents were home and it was the middle of the day, so we got kind of freaked out and decided to wait until after we were done swimming. That said, I heard from Martin Weiland that if you have sex in a pool the girl can’t get a urinary tract infection.: But as far as the birth control…none of them are 100% effective, and I’m a gambling man. So take that for what it’s worth.

WF:Has anyone ever drown in your pool?

BL: No, but we had a end of the year party there in 3rd grade and there was a dead squirrel in the pool and some of the girls started crying. Another time I woke up once to random girls from my neighbor hood skinny dipping in it when i was younger.

WF:Did you take the squirrels to the wildlife rescue?

BL:Their Corpses?

WF:About a month ago a girl brought squirrels to my house then she went to work, and left them there with Yelloweyes, Wade and I.

BL: That sounds like a bad friend to me.

WF:So I had to take care of them. You feed them Pedialyte and unsalted walnuts, and hold them close to maintian warmth. Then you take them to the Wildlife Rescue on Sawmill, near New Market Mall.

BL:Yeah, ours were already dead. Maybe I should though, and maybe I should start trapping them in my back yard and taking them there though, just so they don’t drown or pee in the pool.-the 2nd though

WF:Do squirrels drown often?

BL:: Too often.We haven’t had any fucked up animals drown yet like dogs or a littler of kittens or anything though , Have you seen those signs that are like “welcome to our pool-notice there is no ‘p’ in it, please help us keep it that way. Those aren’t funny. I like the drowning animal thing though.

MP3: Ghost Ride the Herse

MP3: Escape From Dayton

One response to “Nautical Hyperblast Tonight @ The Monster House

  1. bill is pretty weird