Open Letter to Slash: Don’t Do It


Don’t do it. Please. Please don’t do it. It’s early enough that you can just stop this nonsense right now. Please. Please.

I was cruising Rolling Stone’s website today where I came across this article that said you were starting a VH1 Reality TV Show:

The former members of Guns n’ Roses might just have a job for you. Guitarist Slash, bassist Duff McKagan, drummer Matt Sorum and newcomer guitarist Dave Cushner are holding tryouts in Los Angeles to replace Axl Rose — who splintered the original combo in the Nineties — and VH1 is filming the proceedings for a new show. (full story)

Slash, I know how you feel. Every time I see Webster on The Surreal Life I just burst out laughing in a fit of utter glee. It’s great. I even like Survivor, Real World, and sometimes even The Mole. So I see where you’re coming from: you’re a big enough star to get in on the Reality TV world. That’s cool and all, but I think you’re making a mistake.

First of all, no one is going to take you seriously. No one. Not even that guy who wears a fried chicken bucket on his head who is pretending to be the new you in Guns N Roses.

Till this day, not anyone takes The Monkees seriously, and they were formed on television. And what about American Idol? Sure the single from Kelly Whatshername sold a ton, but as we like to say in the industry, “she’s got no legs!” No one will remember her name in 2 years, and Slash, the people who do remember her name, do you want them to remember your new band? No.

Finally, one word: Flickerstick. Decent band, but that VH1 “Band on the Run” show might have done more harm than good in the long run.

Slash, you don’t want to be the next Flickerstick.

Also, I hear one of the people you’re considering for the new lead singer is the guy from Skid Row, Sebastian Bach. Slash, let’s take a trip down memory lane:

That’s Gary Cherone, the guy who took over lead vocal duties for Van Halen. He used to be in a little band called Exxtreme. Remember how everyone made fun of him when he joined VH? I bet you did too.

Slash, if you continue with this show, GARY CHERONE WILL MAKE FUN OF YOU. You don’t want that, I don’t want that, Michael Jackson doesn’t want that.

I’m not that dillusional to think that you read my site, Slash, but maybe a friend of a friend of a friend of a friend does. If so, please pass this letter on to the master of the Snake Pit. Slash can e-mail me here or talk to me about this matter via AIM using my account duffyDW.

I’m considering this a high level emergency. Slash, Axl has ruined most of what was good about Guns N Roses, you’re our only hope. Please don’t go on with this game show. Please. Please.

Bonus! donewaiting.com readers, there is strength in numbers. If you believe in this cause, sign our petition! Together, we can make a difference.

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